If not sincere then do not disturb
by Beautiful Thief
Summary: "Ryouta made a mental note to fire his manager for not telling him about this so that he could get out of doing this stupid thing." - On an 'If You Are The One' style celebrity episode of a dating show, Kise Ryouta's past comes back to catch him.
Dedicated to sann-lykke, cimberelly and ninannarambling for encouraging this ridiculous AU. But at least it got me out of my writing funk, so, there's that. I hope you enjoy it. ^^;;

* * *

If he had known in advance, Ryouta _definitely_ would not have let his manager bully him into appearing on this show.

It started literally months ago, when the idea for a celebrity version of the popular Chinese show _If You Are The One_ was put forth for reasons Ryouta didn't know or particularly care about. He'd been contacted early on about his appearance, being wildly popular among the demographics that would enjoy such a show.

Initially, he hadn't even really cared to do it. He wasn't really interested in setting up a pr romance - he was celebrity enough in his own right now that he didn't need it, and had the option to refuse it. But his manager had whittled him down, promising his presence would be much like certain staple personalities on the original show, where he didn't need to accept anyone, could just be there as charming eye candy, and well, it's hard to argue with that kind of exposure and easy money for standing there and turning people down.

So he'd agreed to do it, signing the contract and almost forgetting about it entirely until his manager reminded him that filming would be starting soon.

Getting dressed was a nightmare that involved a long phone call with one of his older sisters, but eventually, he ended up in something he thought was acceptable - a white shirt left untucked, dark blue blazer which made his shoulders look broad and his waist slim, with the sleeves pushed up his forearms, and slacks, for a simple but effective look - before heading to the studio that had been prepared for the filming. It wasn't an especially long trip; but it was enough for Ryouta to settle into his professional persona, relaxed with an easy smile.

He was fussed over by the makeup artists upon arrival, who prepared him for being filmed under the stage lights, and charmed them into talking him through the procedure, since he hadn't read the briefing documents given to him by his agent. His fellow participants were all people he knew on sight, if not personally, and a few of them were people he'd worked with before. He waved at them as he let the makeup artists excitedly chatter at him about the romanticism of the show and it's goals, and smiled when he could and not get scolded for not holding still while they were working.

And then it was time.

He wasn't really paying too much attention, but from what the artist had told him, they'd be signalled to walk on the stage to music, before ending up at their podiums. It'd been a little while since he'd done catwalk work, but his body remembered how to show itself off properly.

It always did.

"Number seven again, huh?" Ryouta mumbled to himself. It made him smile more genuinely.

The signal went off, and they started walking onto the stage.

Ryouta threw a wink and a kiss at the camera at the front of the stage as he walked past, which he felt appropriate for his professional persona, and then settled in for the day to start, trying to keep his sighs internal instead of external.

He wasn't paying as much attention as he should, but the format meant that he could sort of get away with it. He wasn't called on to speak too much for the first few candidates, and he didn't have any questions for them either - a cute female model, and a regular guy who tried, and failed, to impress any of the girls at the podiums - which suited him just fine.

It wasn't until their fifth candidate that he felt anything at all. In fact, even before he saw the candidate, there was a foreboding feeling in his stomach, as he clapped in time with the music and watched as they - he? - descended.

And then he couldn't _breathe_.

"Hi, my name is Aomine Daiki, I'm twenty-six, and I'm from Tokyo."

 _Fuck_.

Ryouta made a mental note to fire his manager for not telling him about this so that he could get out of doing this stupid thing. Or at least warning him so he could be _prepared_. How was he supposed to deal with, arguably, his biggest and most painful ex-boyfriend with _no notice_?

Especially when he was so ridiculously attractive, like, that wasn't even _fair_.

"Take a look around, Aomine-san, and pick your heartbeat person."

He knew, of course, it couldn't be him, even though his heart began to hammer in his chest, trying to tell him that _maybe_. There were a few girls here who were exactly Aomine's type though, cute and busty idols and after everything, Ryouta couldn't expect Aomine _not_ to pick one of them. He wasn't really sure how he felt about the idea that someone else could be leaving with Aomine, but then, he kind of hoped that once he started talking they'd all turn their lights off, since the likelihood of him saying something stupid was pretty high.

"I like your choice, Aomine-san! That's not a mistake, though, is it?"

Aomine laughed and shook his head, rubbing at the back of his neck in a gesture Ryouta recognised somewhat nostalgically as embarrassment. "No, it's right."

Ryouta felt a nervous stirring in his stomach, but chose to ignore it. That could mean _anything_ \- revealing Aomine's heartbeat person this early would make things difficult for the next stages. But he could see, as he looked around, that the sight of Aomine's smiling face had melted more than just a few of his fellows.

He couldn't blame them. Aomine always did have such a wonderful smile, on the rare occasions that it appeared.

"Ladies and gentlemen, your first impressions of the candidate?"

Ryouta smiled wryly. First impressions were long gone between the two of them. But he wouldn't turn off his light - that would be mean, and it was possible their shared history would come up and then he'd look bad. Better to just leave the supportive light on at this point.

It was just as well, because Aomine proceeded to, unsurprisingly, keep all the lights on from the initial impression, and then Ryouta would have been asked why he turned his light off. He sighed, internally relieved that the awkward questions and interactions were delayed even a tiny bit.

"A very good start!" the host commented. "We'll show your first video, then!"

The lights dimmed, and the video started playing. Ryouta had little doubt that Momoi had orchestrated and filmed this - Aomine was outside, at a basketball court, wearing casual clothes, a basketball tucked in between his body and the crook of his arm. It was probably a later take - he didn't have any of the awkwardness that Ryouta would have expected of him.

"Hi, my name is Aomine Daiki, and I'm a professional basketball player." Aomine brought the ball out and spun it on his finger, not looking at it. "I've been playing basketball since before I can remember. It's kind of one of the most important things in my life. I got scouted a few years back, and I've been playing in the American NBA since then." He let the ball fall into his palms, and he smiled, though it was a little awkward, and clearly Momoi had told him to smile. Ryouta couldn't help the little snort of laughter. "I was born and raised in Tokyo though, and when I retire I'm going to come back and live here, not in America. That's what I was supposed to say, right?"

"Yes, Dai-chan," came Momoi's exasperated voice from behind the camera.

Aomine's smile takes on a more genuine, impish quality as he walks towards the camera. "I know you're supposed to hear from her later, but she's important so I want to introduce you now."

"Dai-chan," Momoi warned, but it was too late - the image blurred as the camera was moved wildly, before centering on the ground first, and then focusing on Momoi, who was frowning, her hair in a bun and wearing a nice summery dress.

"This is Satsuki," Aomine proclaimed proudly. "She's my best friend. Has been since we were little. I put a frog on her head and made her cry, but she still loves me anyway."

Momoi was obviously trying to keep a stern face as she stalked towards him, trying to get her camera back, but there was amusement there too. "You're a brute, Dai-chan!"

"She's pretty much my sister," Aomine continued, ignoring her and keeping out of her reach. "We've been together our whole lives, and that won't ever change, I don't think. Anyone I date has to be able to accept me and Satsuki come together." At this, Momoi's face pinked and she covered her face with her hands.

"You can be really embarrassing sometimes, you know, Dai-chan," Momoi said.

"Yeah," Aomine answered, and then the screen went dark.

The audience clapped, and Aomine looked a little sheepish. A few girls turned off their lights, looking a little mixed after the video.

"Did you think about the idea some of the guys would keep their lights on just to meet your beautiful friend?" the host asked, sounding curious.

"I mean, kinda?" Aomine rubbed the nape of his neck. "But Satsuki's pretty smart, you know, and like, it's not like I want to date a straight guy or anything, though I guess you know, hanging out and making new friends from this would be cool too. Anyway, Satsuki won't go with a guy who isn't straight up about their intentions, you know?"

"I see… brains and beauty then, eh? Sounds like the whole package. Nothing between you two?"

Aomine pulled a face. "Ew. She's like my sister, you know? I said that in the video."

"Yes, you did. And I guess it's just as well for you, since it brings you here as a contestant today. Number 15, you turned off your light. Would you care to explain why?"

Ryouta looked over at the girl - he'd forgotten who was down there - and recognised her as a relatively young model, who he hadn't worked with before. She looked a little embarrassed as she answered. "I don't really know if I feel comfortable with the closeness he has with his friend," she confessed. "I think it would make me feel insecure."

Aomine frowned - it was the adorable confused one he get when he didn't really understand and generally found an opinion to be stupid as a result - but didn't say anything. Clearly Momoi had told him to speak as little as possible.

Too clever by half.

"Nothing so beautiful or fragile as a young maid's heart," the host commented idly. "Next video."

 _Past Relationships_.

Ryouta fought off the rising sense of anxiety bubbling up. He wasn't sure what he wanted to see, if he wanted Aomine to discuss their relationship or not. There was a feeling that if he didn't, it would be because it didn't _matter_ enough.

"Ah, I don't really like to talk about this kind of stuff," Aomine said on the video. He was sitting on a couch, probably in his own apartment. He was rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "When it comes to relationships, I've only had two serious ones. One was really intense, and it was everything I wanted, but we had to keep it a secret, and it put a lot of strain on us. We argued about stupid things a lot, and in the end we had a really painful breakup. I have a lot of regrets about that, because we were good friends and they were good friends with Satsuki too, so we both lost a friend when we broke up." Aomine sighed, and collapsed back against the couch. "The other relationship wasn't for a while after that. I think we were together for…" he paused, trying to remember.

"It was eighteen months," Momoi supplied off-camera.

"Yeah. Something like that. Anyway, I got into the NBA draft so we broke up. Neither of us wanted to do a long distance relationship. I've been mostly focused on playing ball since then. I don't speak English well, so it's not easy to communicate with American girls, and I don't intend to settle down in America after I retire anyway, so I haven't really tried to meet any Japanese girls over here."

The video transitioned to a gym, to the basketball court.

"I'd really like the person I'm with to like basketball," he says, and Ryouta is captured by his shot, like he was all those years ago. "It's a really big part of my life, so we'll probably have problems if you don't. You don't have to play it, or even really understand it and all the rules, as long as you can enjoy watching it, I guess?" His gaze moves away from the camera, likely to Momoi, and he seems reassured by something. Ryouta figured she gave him a thumbs up behind the camera. "I have a type of girl I like, but I also know that if I like who you are, it doesn't matter in the end what you actually look like. By the way, the kind of girl I like has big boobs."

Ryouta can't help it. Despite everything, he starts laughing, and it's only then that he realises that lights have been turning off, and especially a fair number after what he just said. It's just unfortunate that's the end of the video, because it makes him easy for the host to pick out.

"Seven is laughing," the host said, picking him out. "You two know have a history, is that correct?"

Ryouta stopped laughing almost immediately, his professional smile mixing in with his personal one. "Yeah, Aominecchi and I go way back to middle school. I'm keeping my light on to support him." He leaned over his podium and wiggled his fingers at Aomine. "It's been a while, Aominecchi. You haven't changed at all."

"Neither have you, Kise," Aomine answered, a faint grin on his face.

"Did Momocchi hit you for saying that?" he asked, curious.

"It's Satsuki," is all Aomine says in response, so Ryouta knew that she definitely did.

"We should catch up later," Ryouta says, because it's expected of him, probably, to play this kind of part. "Filming is still going on!"

The audience laughed, and Aomine looked like he wanted to argue that the whole world could wait for all he cared, because Aomine was just the kind of guy who would ask such a thing,, but he didn't, and the host regained the focus.

"Thirteen."

"If you're happy being single, how come you've come onto this show?" she asked.

"It's an opportunity," Aomine answered, and Ryouta can see a practiced response from him when he sees it. _Is he hiding something?_ "My manager thinks that I need some more exposure here to get some good contracts for sponsorship, even if I do make a lot playing ball."

The girl nodded, and it took a moment for Ryouta to realise that even now, he simply just _knows_ Aomine, knows what it looks like when he's keeping a secret, when he's saying something he's practiced, and that the others here haven't realised.

He zoned out a little for the rest of the questions, of which the remaining girls have a few - the rest of the guys on the stage had already turned off their lights, those of the inclination to date Aomine having written him off as straight, and the others because _they_ were straight - and he didn't realise the last video was playing until he heard a painfully familiar, even-toned voice.

"Aomine-kun is a little bit stupid."

Ryouta started, and looked up at the video incredulously. Why on earth did Aomine think that Kuroko was the best person for this? Kuroko loved Aomine, but he was also painfully honest.

"He's very passionate about the things he likes, but his attention wanders easily when it's something he doesn't care so much about. He has a tendency to not work as hard as he could as well. But he's a very caring person. Aomine-kun has been my friend for many years, and I would not stay his friend if he was not a good person. Aomine-kun is very kind, even if he is shy and grumpy about expressing it, and he can be very thoughtful, if you give him enough time."

The video shifted to Kagami, and Ryouta resisted the urge to look at Aomine and give him the biggest _why_ expression he could muster.

"Ah, Aomine's… Aomine, I guess? He's kind of… well, he's… Ah, we don't always get along, him and me, because we're too similar, but at the same time, he's also done some things when the time calls for it which were super generous without ever asking for anything in return, so in the end he's a pretty decent guy. Sometimes I think he still has a bad attitude, but he's a lot better than he used to be, I guess."

The video switched to Momoi after that, smiling sweetly at the camera. "Dai-chan can be an acquired taste, even I will admit that," she says, "but he's really worth it. He can be very devoted. I know him better than anyone, and as long as you're honest, to the point and don't play mind games with him, he'll be receptive and take on board the things you say. He's not very good at reading between the lines, so you need to be direct with him or he won't understand. He can get frustrated easily, and he can yell, but Dai-chan's more bark than bite, and he never goes out with the intention of hurting people. I really think Dai-chan's very special, so I hope that you'll be a special sort of person that I'll be able to get along with."

The video ends there, and Ryouta heard a few more lights turn off. When he looked around, there were four girls, and him, left with their lights on, and at least two of them were Aomine's type.

Ryouta felt like his heart stopped. _Aomine will choose someone over me_. Even after all this time, he didn't think he'd be able to bear it, for Aomine choose someone else. He didn't think he could deal with Aomine coming over here and pretending to be okay as Aomine turned off his supporting light.

His reflexes had always been fast. Even as the host went to tell Aomine to turn off two lights, he hit the button to turn off his light himself.

"It's your turn now, Aomine-san. Please turn off one light."

Ryouta couldn't help watching as Aomine walked towards the girls. It's like a slow-motion trainwreck, where he knew the outcome would only bring pain, and still he couldn't bring himself to look away. Aomine looked over at him for a moment before he moved over to the girls who still had their lights on - Fourteen, Twenty and Twenty Four - and turned Twenty Four's light off. She wasn't what Ryouta would call the bustiest girl of the three, but she also wasn't the flattest either, and that he would turn her off instead of Fourteen was puzzling enough that it distracted him while Fourteen and Twenty walked up the stage.

"Shall we see Aomine-san's favourite person?" the host asked. Ryouta felt like there was some kind of glee to his question, and everyone looked up at the screens - even him, pretty sure it was Seventeen, who had turned her light off earlier, as she was the bustiest girl on the stage.

He definitely wasn't expecting to see the number 7 there in bright red. _His_ number.

"Seven, please come forward."

Completely unexpected, Ryouta was frozen for a good moment before number Six, a guy he knew by face but not name, poked his arm and brought him back. It was probably worse, Ryouta thought, a little faintly, to walk up the stage alone, instead of doing so by the side of someone else like the girls had gotten to do. At least then, everyone's attention was shared. Here, he was the center of everyone's attention as he walked, _especially_ considering that he was a man.

Twenty offered him a microphone as he turned to face Aomine, and he took it, smiling at her. He felt hot, and a little shaky, but he was also determined that no one should be able to see it.

"Pick a question from the list," the host told Aomine.

"Topic seven."

"Pictures of the candidates. An unusual choice, when you can see them in person."

 _It's different_ , Ryouta wanted to say. _It's different because a selfie I take isn't half as staged as a modelling photo or my appearance in a studio_. But he kept quiet, and watched as the pictures showed on the screen.

"You may ask your own question now," the host prompted.

Aomine nodded to him, and then paused for a moment. Ryouta had little doubt the question would have been decided well in advance, with Momoi there to sort it out. He just wasn't sure what the question would be.

"My career means that I spend a lot of time overseas in America, and I only spend a few months a year in Japan. However, when I retire I plan to return to live in Japan permanently. Do you think we can survive the years of long distance with a few months together every year, until I return to Japan permanently?"

"Who should answer first?"

Aomine waved at Fourteen on Ryouta's right.

"I think I would be lonely," she said, "but if you could come visit me and I could come visit you and we talked a lot it might work. But I don't like the odds of a long distance relationship working out, so I'd hope you would retire sooner to be with me."

They paused for the applause. "Seven," the host said, indicating that it was his turn to answer.

"Um… well, I go to various places around the world for my work, for Fashion Weeks and such…" he paused, trying to get his bearings. _If Aomine was his boyfriend again_. He closed his eyes for a moment, then opened them to continue. "I have my own money, so I can visit when my schedule allows. I can be a demanding partner, so I can get lonely sometimes and you'd need to be prepared for that. I don't have a bias against long distance relationships and..." he paused again, uncertain whether he should continue. Finally, he just said it. "And I know how much it means to you to be playing in the NBA, so I think I could be strong while you live out your dream."

He looked down as he lowered the microphone and the applause thundered in his ears. He hadn't been prepared mentally, to put himself back into the thought-space of being Aomine's partner. The pain of their breakup, of the loss endured as he shied from contact with both him and Momoi, and the loneliness of being without him, seemed to return, even if it wasn't as strong as it had been back then.

Ryouta wasn't sure if he could make it through another breakup with Aomine, if he gave his heart away again. At this point, to believe he didn't still love him seemed to be the worst kind of self-delusion.

"Twenty."

"I don't like long distance relationships," she said. "I think it's too easy to grow estranged and hide, or to not understand each other properly. I would still try my best to make it work, but I think my feelings would probably make it difficult for the relationship to survive until your retirement."

"Thank you," Aomine said, and it sounded strange to hear him say it, because in Ryouta's memory, it wasn't the most frequently used expression in his vocabulary.

"You may now choose one of the candidates. If you insist on Seven, you may be rejected and leave alone. However, you may take one of the others."

"I'll insist on him," Aomine answered, almost instant, a crooked smile on his face. Ryouta bit his lip.

"Please return," the host said to the girls. They each gave Ryouta an encouraging smile before they walked back the length of the stage to their podiums.

"You have thirty seconds to convince him to leave with you," the host informed Aomine, and stepped back. Ryouta looked up then, because if Aomine was going through with this, then the least he deserved was for Ryouta to look him in the eye. Even if it was, perhaps, the most dangerous thing for him to do.

Aomine stepped towards him. "Kise." He stopped. " _Ryouta_. I have loved you for so long I don't know what it's like not to anymore. You're annoying, and you're loud, and you're stubborn and you can't stand losing. But you're… for me, you're the only one." He rubbed the back of his neck. "I know that maybe I don't deserve a second chance, and maybe you feel like you don't either, I don't know. But I want the second chance anyway. And I've come here hoping you want it too."

Ryouta swallowed. His throat felt tight and thick, and his vision was going blurry - fuck why did Aomine always make him cry? - as he stared at Aomine while he took a few more steps forward, until he was right in front of him.

"I still love you, you know? So if you still love me, come with me."

Ryouta felt his eyes begin to overflow, and he finally had to blink, which caused the tears to roll down his cheeks. "You're the worst, Aominecchi," he said, but he hadn't lifted the microphone, and he saw Aomine smile.

"Yeah," he answered. "But you love me anyway."

Ryouta covered his face with his hands, trying to hide his face while he tried to get it back under control. "I do," he answered. "Even though you're the worst, I do."

Aomine's arms were around him in an instant, pulling him into his body and guiding his face into his neck and shoulder to hide his tears. Ryouta wished he knew how Aomine always knew what to _do_ even if he didn't always know what to say.

"Congratulations," Ryouta heard the host call out. "The couple has won a trip to the Aegean Sea!"

"Come on," Aomine said, and it rumbled in Ryouta's ear. "Wipe your face, Ryouta, we need to walk down the stage."

"Don't tell me what to do," Ryouta said, but he did as he was told anyway, and smiled at him when he backed away for Aomine to take his hand so they could walk down the platform and out the back.

Aomine's grip on his hand was as sure as Ryouta's was shaky as they walked, he was relieved when they bowed out and went backstage to the interview room.

"Did you date before?" the interviewer asked.

"That one long term relationship I talked about, that was with him," Aomine answered. "We dated when we were younger, but it was a secret. We broke up because I was jealous over him."

"I got so freaked out when you talked about that!" Ryouta whined. "But I don't think it was all your fault anymore, Aominecchi. We were really young, I didn't understand your feelings well enough."

Aomine put his arm around his shoulders and pulled him in against him.

"Were you worried Kise-san would reject you, Aomine-san?"

"I was a little worried he would reject me," he admitted. "We haven't been in contact since we broke up so I didn't know anything about his feelings. But since we were avoiding each other, I had to make this effort to find him again."

"It's only fair! I made all the effort last time by confessing even though I didn't even know if you liked boys!"

"Yeah yeah." Aomine's hand came up to mess with his hair. "You cut your hair. It's shorter now."

"It's a more mature look! Not like you would understand!"

Aomine kissed his cheek and Ryouta felt his face grow hot. "Let's make this work, Ryouta." He laughed when Ryouta covered his face with his hands.

"You're seriously the worst…"

Aomine stood up, and offered his hand. "Come on. Satsuki's probably having kittens out the back. She's missed you, you know."

Ryouta smiled up at him, and felt like he was going to start crying all over again. "Me too," he said. He let Aomine pull him up, and on the other side of the interview room door, he paused, making Aomine look back at him.

"I still love you too, Aominecchi."

Aomine smiled at him, one of the small, warm honest ones that made Ryouta's knees weak. "I know," he said, and Ryouta let go of his hand to hit him.


End file.
